Not your typical femme

On feeling defiant. (Published IOTBA)

Sorry I don't live up to your stereotype
Of what a woman should be
I've got stretch marks and baker's arms
Crooked teeth, a big nose
Sorry old chum... that's just me.
I'm not into high heels - I like all my bones
Tight jeans just ride up my crutch
You can stick your Brazilian
But I do pluck my brows
'Cos looking like Oscar just sucks.
I fire up quite quick, I can get rather loud
There's nothing quite like a debate
But I don't take too kindly
To being told what to do
And don't ever call me your "mate".
I like my house tidy, I don't like a mess
But if I make one at least it is mine
I'm nobody's maid
I have my own job
And I say what I do with my time.
I go to the gym, I dance, I sing loud
I'm annoying, I'm pithy, never twee
And if that gets your back up
Don't make it my fault
Like it or lump it... that's me.
So if you're looking for your typical femme
You'd better go find her elsewhere
'Cos this woman's not
From a "typical" mould
And guess what my friend - I DON'T CARE!

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